Selfish

I have been incredibly selfish lately, and it’s only going to get worse until the show’s over. I haven’t made the time to spend with family that I really ought to and I avoid committing to plans so I won’t feel too guilty when I flake at the last minute.

The Flighty Artist is about to make a comeback, too. Sorry.

A little selfishness is a healthy thing. I am a believer of the idea that emotions are contagious, and that whatever you put out in the world is what you get back. And if you’re constantly running around to make everyone else happy, leaving yourself for an afterthought, that doesn’t leave you with a whole lot of joy to spread.

At least, that’s been my experience.

I don’t have the time I used to, to spend with friends and family, even without getting involved in theater again. I miss it. And being so busy makes for crazy times. For sheer mental health, I need breaks – quiet time to myself. Which means that, with Turn of the Screw gearing up, my life involves the day job, theater, and writing. The end.

It feels incredibly selfish, but everything else – mainly family and friends, anything resembling a social life – will have to wait until November.

And guilt won’t stop me from enjoying the hell out of it. Lately, I’ve been handed some amazing opportunities that aren’t likely to come knocking twice. I’d regret not doing and following through on them a whole lot more.

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