A Note On Breakdowns

A curious thing happened after my last post: I had friends and family checking up on me.

Which is not to say I didn’t appreciate hearing from every single one of you. You are all amazing and I am honored that you care about me. Thank you for that. ♥

I almost chose not to mention the breakdown. After all, the point of the post was the fact that I get a chance to do something exciting and terrifying that will go a long way to fulfilling a dream that I’ve maybe never quite believed possible.

Let’s face it: there is not enough discussion about mental and emotional health. There is a stigma attached to the subject, and treating it like it’s something rare or unique or unusual isn’t helping anyone.

That’s why I didn’t edit it out of the last post. Well, that and because I felt truly badass for being such a wreck and then doing something so awesomely terrifying.

Breakdowns are considered a weakness, and weakness is shameful. Or so society seems to want us to believe. But acknowledging and embracing weakness is also a form of strength. Breakdowns happen every day and are nothing to be ashamed of. I don’t understand dancing around the fact of them or using coded language to talk about them as obliquely as possible.

Newsflash: none of this makes them go away; it only perpetuates the culture of avoidance.

They happen to all of us, at one point or another, because life is hard, and we all reach a point where we just can’t deal with it. Some of us are blessed and privileged with the ability to get through them – move past them – more quickly than others. (I think I’m one of the privileged ones, so please take all this with a grain of salt.)

If I’m talking about a breakdown, that means it’s over and done, and I’m fine. Seriously. And if you’re checking up on me, please be patient if I’m confused and don’t immediately remember why you might be concerned.

Most importantly, thank you for caring.

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7 thoughts on “A Note On Breakdowns

  1. Well… I’ve had wordpress on, for about five mins now, and I’ve been questioning whether to leave a response, or not.

    Apparently….I’ve decided to leave one. First, I swear, I’m not a one-upper. As I’ve mentioned to you before, life has been repeatedly kicking me in the nads. (Ok, maybe not quite rhat frank)

    For me, checking out for gooe has never been an option. Not because the thoughts aren’t there, but because I’m an underachiever, and skeptic. I know if I did something stupid, it wouldn’t take. I already know…if I did something I couldn’t undo, I’d be the guy that wouldn’t 86 himself, but I would be the guy that would do just enough to live a long life, w/ poor motor skills and regret to last me a lifetime.

    Sorry M. J., I know I’m being a buzzkill…on an already less than cheery topic. I don’t write well, for someone who see’s himself as a writer. Also…I’m worse as an editor. Forgive me, I felt a need to vent.

    • Thank you for commenting. Seriously. (And sorry this has taken me so long to get back to! Ugh.)

      I sometimes wonder if it’s easier for me to talk about mental health because I’m one of the relatively lucky ones, in the fact that this is not a daily struggle. So when conversations like this start, it becomes incredibly important for those with varying degrees to weigh in. Otherwise, perception could be so very easily skewed to the idea that the lower difficulty setting is as bad as it gets, or is indicative of everyone else. The danger then is the invalidation of any experiences at a higher difficulty setting.

      So thank you.

      • If speaking out on this subject is easier for you, it’s probably because you’re a communicator . No crime in that.

        Everyone has there struggles. I’m not learned enough to say which is by circumstance, depressing, and which leans toward clinical depression, but like the R.E.M. song says; Everybody Hurts Sometime.

        We navigate the waters as best we can, I guess.

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